Saturday, January 11, 2014

The View from Here, With Chaffing Thighs

In addition to spending more time in New York City, one of my other journeys this year has been trudging up the sloping hills, through the thorny valleys, across rugged peaks, in to shadowed forests and along dismal swamps of the land called Menopause.

Last month, I spent the day feeling 'off', like something was amiss as I walked through the house and around the neighborhood, going about my day.  It wasn't until the end of the day that I realized what I was experiencing: it was the feeling of my thighs rubbing together, causing a burning sensation new to my formerly slim legs.

Just last month, I spent the day feeling 'off', like something was amiss as I walked through the house and around the neighborhood, going about my day.  I was experiencing an odd burning sensation in my legs and I couldn't figure out what was happening. It wasn't until the end of the day as I prepared for bed that I looked in the mirror and saw that my thighs were pink.  It was then that I realized what I had been experiencing all day was the feeling of my thighs rubbing together as I walked, a first for my formerly thin thighs.

Menopause has brought many things in to my life, including weight gain, bloating, moodiness, low libido and an overwhelming feeling of middle age.  Last week, as I photographed a group of 18 year old girls at a birthday party, I found myself staring at their smooth skin, thin arms, taut stomachs and perky bosoms.  How have I reached post-menopause at 44 years of age?  Wasn't it just yesterday that I turned 30 and reveled in reaching a state of self awareness and confidence?  Now, 14 years later, I find myself relating to the "older" generation of women in my community.

This is not a transition I was emotionally prepared to embark on so soon.





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